I guess I inadvertently turned Sad Robot into a monthly instead of bi-weekly serial. Whoops! There were extenuating circumstances that lead to this being so delayed, most of which revolve around my fanatical and apparently unshakable constant rewriting disease. Luckily, a ginger haired lady dork by the name of Da Grand Patch Masta Flash Patchie Deth came waltzing into my monkey sphere and efficiently motivated me with much mocking and got me off my proverbial writing ass. You should probably check out her webcomic, Funemployment. Not just because I have a thing for her and want to get into her pants on a regular basis, but also because she is super talented. Don’t tell her I said that though, I’m trying to play this cool.

Anyway, this is actually an incredibly heavily edited version of what I originally wrote for this entry. I think the first edit was something like 8000 words and that was just ridiculous. So I went back through and got it down to what it is now, which is still longer than I want any of my serials to be, but I like how it turned out so I can’t complain. The entries will probably get shorter and shorter as I find myself having to explain less of the world these silly little robots live in and can focus more on dialog between them. At this point I’m really trying to see how long I can go without including more than a few lines of dialog.

This also taught me that I’m awful at deadlines, so I’m not putting deadlines on when I’m going to do these anymore, my habits are just too crazy for that, but I promise I’ll be continuing with updates and even throwing some unpublished short stories into the mix in order to keep the spice content flowing here. Now that I have this monkey on my back I also will be opening up the floodgates on the fucking enormous amount of backlog I have to finish up for Ripten. I bet you are excited for that. You aren’t? Whatever, you suck. Click it anyway. And if you don’t like it, blame Patchie for goading me into continuing it.

Sad Robot and His Realization that Girl Robots Have Different Squishy Parts

I promised you a new project would be starting now that I’ve cut down on my game journalism responsibilities and recommitted to my starving artistness, and here it is.

SAD ROBOT is a tale about, what else, a robot. Although he isn’t very sad. Not all the time at least. Sad Robot lives in a city, and he, like all the other robots in the city, spends his entire artificially created life training for a job in The Factory, but he doesn’t know why. SAD ROBOT will be an ongoing series of stories about his desire to find out why. And also his desire to find out why he wants to find out why. He has a lot of desires, and he doesn’t really understand any of them either. SAD ROBOT is just a simple story about a robot as he finds himself in a world that wasn’t built for robots that were built like him.

I’ve been neglecting my little pet writing experiment lately due to the pitfalls of needing to scrounge up money for my bills, but no longer fair readers! My stream-of-consciousness-no-planning-ahead sci-fi serial continues now. I have moved it over to its own section of the site, but I will make sure to update the main page just to let you know that a new entry is over there. The general idea for those of you tuning in late is that I’ve developed pretty terrible OCD about writing fiction and end up outlining, planning, or just rewriting everything I do to death. I also have a terrible superstition about showing my work to people before it is finished. In order to beat all of those negatives out of me, I am doing a serial without even cursory planning- entirely stream of consciousness. I write until I’m bored and then post it as a part of the story. I only give it a cursory edit job and I won’t be allowing myself any rewrites unless I absolutely have to fix some glaring plot fuck up. The link to the right of this post (the one that says EXTERMINATORS in CAPS EAGLE) will aggregate all of these bits in once place from now on.

Anyway part 002 of the story is up. The talented Tara (Russian Housewives) no longer has to be hanging on her cliff about my last entry. You happy now!

Also expect a few design changes and some artistic expressions that don’t look as visually appealing as a bank statement over here as the gorgeous rainy island dweller Rebecca Holdcroft will be moving her art in soon. Or at least she better be or else a stern talking to will be in order.

It feels so weird to be putting my writing up without anything beyond a cursory read over and, especially, without any rewrites. I’m pretty sure this is the only way to get past my near OCD like level of editing when it comes to my writing, so I guess I’ll just deal with it. Last week was just a first person prologue and I liked how it went, but this week I tried something different. I still haven’t decided where this is going or anything, this is purely a “off the top of my head” experiment. I don’t think this week is very strong but, who knows, you are your own worst critic.

I am also contemplating moving this to its own blog just for organizations sake. That should be up a little bit later when I address some of my actual paying work deadlines.

Oh, and if you are a geek you are probably going to recognize a lot of the names of characters and things in this story as it goes on. I didn’t want to take too much time in trying to make up names that sound awesome or are some allusion to the character, I feel like that is way overdone, so I took some inspiration from other sources.

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Well, it’s been a long while since I’ve put anything fiction up on the intertubez. Probably since my stint at moodspins and my  Hunter S. Thompson tribute. I have a weird superstition about showing people my work before it gets published, and since I’m not living in a solid gold house and drinking champagne for breakfast you can probably tell how well thats going. I also began to focus on writing comic books scripts, which is something that doesn’t exactly make for the most exciting reading material. I forget who said it, but I remember reading a comic writer say that, while writers create the story and the characters, an artist has all the fun since their finished work is interesting and eye catching, while a writers finished work looks like a bank statement. I also mainly only do long fiction, and my last attempt at doing a serious serial was put on hold due to my pursuit of a video game journalism career.

Recently I’ve begun to collaborate on a few things with an absolutely fantastic artist by the name of Rebecca Holdcroft, and I’m not just saying that because the two of us could use the word collaborate as a bit of sexual innuendo, she really is fantastic. The problem is that I finished the last comic book script I did nearly six months ago, and the novel I was working on was wrapped up nearly a year and a half ago pending me rewriting a good amount of it because I’m a fickle artist type, so to say I was rusty was a bit of an understatement. Nothing I was doing was really coming out the way I wanted it to, so I decided to do something constructive and work the rust off in front of the ten of you who actually read this blog. I decided to do something nice and easy. I’m not scripting anything out, or doing a plot outline, I don’t even know where I’m going with it. I can’t tell you how many pages I’ll release a week or any of that. Hell I’ll probably go back and change stuff and you will get to witness my incredible obsession with rewriting. Hopefully it will be interesting to you both from a story standpoint and to see how my creative process works. Feel free to leave me any feedback or creative criticism, as I’ll most likely take it into consideration since this project is 100% malleable.

First entry after the jump.

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I digress- this year did not disappoint in the pleasant surprise department. Although “pleasant” may not be the best word to describe a fairly traditional revenge drama as blood soaked at this one was. The name of the film in question is WET. I remember seeing a short trailer for WET in this same theater during a double feature of Ms. 45 and Thriller – A Cruel Picture. I mentally tagged it in my head to check it out but it got lost in the shuffle until now.